Anxiety is a suffocating feeling of fear that affects you physically as well as mentally. It can feel like your heart is coming out of your chest you get breathless though you’re just sitting at your desk. Suffering from anxiety is like constant dread feeling even when there is nothing to be scared of. My mind makes me feel there is always something to worry about. I over think every single thing and the physical effects of this are no appetite, breathing difficulties, sleepless nights. I feel constantly tired, sad. Nothing really brings me joy. On some days, It’s so exhausting that I can’t even get up from my bed. I feel a void inside me and I feel that I need to do whatever it takes to fill that void.But then I pause and take deep breaths.
I have days of restlessness , breathlessness, self doubt, anger , aggression, sadness but I still go to my office, I laugh , I talk. I have lunch with my colleagues but there’s still a feeling of uneasiness inside me. Every day is like living a lie and everyone sees me as a confident woman with her own business and career. Nobody sees me in my room at night crying and alone and thinking about whether there will ever be a day it doesn’t hurt.
When you are anxious, your mind does overwork. Start finding some time to cool your brain down and give it some space. Whenever I am feeling anxious or stressed then I take deep breaths. I listen to the movement of my breath. Focusing on breathing is effective for me.
When I have too many thoughts in my mind then the first thing I can do is go to sleep. If I can’t sleep then I take my diary or journal and I write what I am feeling and what exactly triggers it. These two things help me a lot. I am somebody who can’t talk about my feelings or struggle with someone. I can’t open up to anyone. If you can so it’s good to talk to someone. Tell family and friends how you’re feeling. They will understand.
There are so many times where I feel low, where I blame myself for everything , where I hate myself. It’s tough to deal with those moments. But I know that the only person that can help me is me. Forgive yourself. That’s the best you can do to yourself. Don’t be hard on yourself.
Darling, don’t be sad, go on listen to your favorite music, dance, eat, cook, read or just write!